Boneheads Gigs Musicians Rants


I’m on the “stories of bands I’ve done shows with” flow right now. So today’s victim is the Smithereens.

First off I must say I like the Smithereens music. It is just plain good rock and roll. I don’t want to ruin their secret, but you know all those Marshall guitar amps you see on the stage? They’re all empty. If you know anything about Marshalls you know they are loud as hell. One Marshall can cover a large stage/venue. The Smithereens have tons of Marshalls on the stage and the audience goes “wow look at all those marshalls.” But the cabinets are hollow with no speakers in them. It is all for show those damn cheaters. They are not the only ones that do this either…

My band has done several shows with the Smithereens. I’m guessing about 5. One time we did a show with them in Park City. Apparently the venue didn’t provide them with an “ample” PA system. While I was listening to their show I noticed a terrible distortion and crackling out of the mains. I went up to the soundman and asked him if he could hear the distortion. He said sure and explained that since the PA wasn’t as big as they wanted it, he was going to simply push it way beyond the limits and “blow the fucker.” Well ok then.

The next time we played with them was at a convention hall in Salt Lake. The shows went well. My band had to book out of the gig because we were playing another show at a club about 1 block away. When the Smithereens finished their gig they came over to our gig and the rest of the night was a fun jam fest.

After the gig at the club we all went to my bass player’s house to continue the party. We were all having a good time but the Smithereen dudes needed to have even more of a good time. They started asking everyone there if they had any “blow.” Apparently someone there actually did. (After all, all musicians are on drugs). The party continues until the Smithee’s ran out of their blow. Then they start asking everyone there to call their friends or drug dealers to get them more blow. This happened SEVERAL times.

After doing that much blow, our Smithereen buddies started to get obnoxious. They were starting to really bug the hell out of everyone there and scared most the people away (including me). My bass player told me that the Smithee’s were the last ones to leave, when he “kicked their miserable asses out of his house” at 5:30am.