Back in the Navy phase of my wasted youth, on a stop in the Philippines, a bunch of us were drinking in a bar, when one of the senior petty officers in the division happened to stop in the same bar. He was drunk (and a smartass, to boot), and started giving us shit about the fact that we were actually using bottle openers on the bottles of San Miguel we were drinking. He claimed that, if we were real men, we would break the necks of the bottles on the edge of the table, and drink it straight from the broken bottle.

Suuuuurrrre thing, Boats.

Of course, he showed up for muster the next morning with a big cut on his lip.